Journal Entry from October 2011- On Death

Hello dears. Usually, when I post a blog post, there's no planning going into it. I open up blogger on a computer or my iPod, and I begin unceremoniously dropping my thoughts onto you. But I've decided that some of my journal entries may interest someone, so I'll be picking some of them to be transferred to here. The one you are about to read is (approximately, I forgot to date it) from October 2011. It is some of my views on death, which I have extensively thought about since I was young. No one in my life died or anything, I was just a morbid child, with long periods of time alone to think way too much. So, without further ado, let the entry begin. 

I don't fear death. Death isn't malevolent or evil. It just is. It's a force of nature. Things only acquire attributes when we assign them.
We fear ending, because we can't be sure of what happens next. We may find some small comfort in religions that claim to show us the way to eternal life. But who wants eternal life? What paradise will be satisfying for billions of trillions of years? Why must death be temporary to subside our fears? Our life would still be ended, taking us from our loved ones, our possessions, and the things we love to do.
What makes that better than death? It seems not to be the act of leaving this mortal coil we fear, then. So what is it? Are we afraid it will hurt? Because if it does, it will still hurt if we follow it with paradise. Is it fear of nothingness?
Maybe it's a survival instinct that prompts us to want to BE. Maybe our fear of death stems from our need to live, to perpetuate our species. Maybe without this fear, we would be more flippant, not caring about anything, because what's the worst that can happen? Death? Who's afraid of death?
Maybe the courageous died, taking their courage with them, only to live on in legend. The skittish and frightened passed on their traits, because they ran from battle. But is it better, then, to live a coward than to die with glory and honor?
I want to know what, if anything, lies beyond the last breath. I want to see death with my own eyes. Maybe the genetics of the ill-fated curious got passed down to me.
Who knows.

          Raven